Poema II ~ I just hope my damage soul leads me to a river of money

No momento da minha inspiração, decidi escrever este poema em inglês. Porque que o indivíduo que presenciava aquele momento, não percebe a língua estrangeira, fora provavelmente a palavra universalmente conhecida Fuck. Para ele tornara-se numa espécie de código indecifrável. Conhece as vogais, conhece as consoantes, mas juntas não faziam sentido. Era aí que eu dominava. Podia olhar o quanto quisesse, mas seria como observar o céu. Tantas nuvens, tantas nuvens que moldam várias formas, mas o que serão ao certo ..

» I just hope my damage soul leads me to a river of money

I just hope my damage soul
leads me to a river of money
My pain can be compared to a river
But all i can express are little drops
They're so little,
i can barelly see them
but i can feel it

Black take advantage of white
blue means fun
inside of the blue, there is fun
after the fun all i can find
is a dark bottom
i can feel it, i can touch it
but aren't bottoms suppost to be endless ?
well i guess i've reach my end

Dark, dark end
I see a rainbow in the middle of all thar darkness
my hapiness, my memories
i won't get close
because i know it will destroy me
there is no hapiness
just broken pieces of old laughs

I shoul die
I shoul have a slow and painfull death
I will die

This bitterness is killing me
eating me till my bones
only my eyes remain
so i can witness my destroction
the nothing i've always been
has now become nothing
nothing changed

I opened the door
i was hoping for hapiness
but all i found was yelling
hate in those eyes, gall*
i'm hated

I'll carry a cross of guilt
but i'm innocent
i know i'm innocent

What's the point of defending myself
every word i say, every sound i make
it's a lie, a fallacy*
an error of reasoning*
he hears lies, when i'm saying the truth
i just hope i shoke in my spit
so i don't have to hear your voice
see the hate in your eyes

Every breath that i take i a seek* for help
so don't believe everything that you breath
there is no such thing has trash, or garbage
there're only regreats of life
i was born with fear
i'm dead with regreats

Cats don't have 9 lifes
they just reborn has spirits to hunt you
we can't distinguish real of unreal
maybe it's just a mixture of panic
yeah, i hope you are watching me this time
i'm not pretending my pain
i'm just embracing* it
a super hug, i'll never let it go

In this room, where commiting suicide is forbiden
I shoul eat 'till i explode
i'm full
thanks for the visit, Good bye

* Gall - rancor / Fallacy - falácia / Reasoning - racioçínio / Seek - procura /Embracing - Abraçar

Eu sei que o poema pode pareçer um bocado Emoático xD mas não tenho intenções de me matar . Não agora, não é o momento certo xDD Mentira 8D . Ser-se drámatico ás vezes, não faz mal a ninguem ..

Janna :3

ps. Foi daqui que tirei o nome do blogue xD